Thursday, March 31, 2005

Terri Schiavo 3/31/05

Well it finally happened Terri Schiavo passed on. Sure technically she wasn't a celebrity but the nation made here a semi celebrity. After nearly two weeks after getting her feeding tube removed . Let the heated debates continue!!!! I don't know about how people feel about it, but I just know I was tired of hearing about it and didn't think the nation should have been worried about it.

I really have two questions that come out of this whole deal:
1) Will Jesse Jackson whore onto anything to get on TV?
2) Why all of a sudden did the pictures of young vibrant Terri come out once her tube war removed?

Okay here it is folks Terri Schiavo CITW:

Goodbye Terri Schiavo
Controversy knew you well
You had some type of brain injury
The doctors would surely tell
You couldn't crawl to nowhere
With a feeding tube pulled out by hand
Became a controversy lightening rod
There's Jesse Jackson again

And it seemed to me that you lived your life
Like a candle in the wind
Try to put a ham sandwich
In your feeding tube again
And it seemed like I did know you
Wish I was still a kid
Your candle burned out long before
Those pictures preaccident every did

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Johnny Cochran-This is an outrage! 3/29/05

This is an outrage! Famous lawyer Johnny Chochran died yesterday from brain cancer. I'm sure you know that he came to real national fame when he was able to get O.J. "still searching for the real killers of his wife" Simpson. Johnny would go onto be famous for being put on retainer by every celebrity in Hollywood who would appear to the general public as being guilty of some crime. I'm sure if he would have been in good health he would have been involved in the whole Terri Schiavo case (Hey Jesse Jackson where ya been), but he wasn't healthy enough to do it. Johnny also was the inspiration of one of my favorite second tier Seinfeld characters: Jackie Childs. Well rest in peace Johnny. Vigil same time, sameplace.

Goodbye Johnny Cochran
Guilty celebrities knew you well
You had the grace to get off fools
Doesn’t fit..must acquit the jury you did tell
You crawled out of law school
With a love of rhyming in your hand
Became a TV star
Once that Bronco chase began

And it seemed to me you lived your life
Like a candle in the wind
Never knowing when to say"I object!" to Ito again
And it seemed like I did know you
I was a college kid
Your candle burned out long after
Chris Darden’s TV career ever did

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Seinfeld cast member death....

Well Barney Martin who was the second actor to play Jerry's dad died yesterday. Jerry's parrents were after a while pretty regular characters on the show and actually were in some really funny episodes. I've put some pieces in those episodes below in this version of CITW. The vigil will be at the same time and same place as usual. I believe the belt less overcoat was called "The Diplomat" if I'm not mistaken. Yes he did serve as president of the complex for a while before he was thrown out of office in disgrace....I don't think he ever got over that. Anywhere here it is:

Goodbye Barney Martin
Thought I knew you pretty well
You invented the belt less raincoat
Played Jerry's dad so well
You crawled out of nowhere
Livin in Del Boca Vista must be grand
Became a Seinfeld regular
With an astronaut pen in your hand

And it seemed to me that you lived your life
Like a candle in the wind
Never knowing how much to tip
Jerry got you that calculator again
And it seemed that I did know you
The last acting jobs you did
Your candle burned out long before
Your presidential legacy ever did.